1. What did you do in 2007 that you’d never done before? Therapy/counseling. Bought a house. Started up a playgroup.
2. Did you keep your new year’s resolutions, and will you make more for next year? I don’t think I made any resolutions last year, did I? As for 2008… I have big plans. Just stay tuned.
3. Did anyone close to you give birth? My stepsister-in-law had a baby boy, and a friend from the medical school days had a little girl – both in May.
4. Did anyone close to you die? No, thank God.
5. What countries did you visit? None. How boring am I?
6. What would you like to have in 2008 that you lacked in 2007? More money. More time with my husband.
7. What dates from 2007 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?
January 11 – I lost our baby at close to 11 weeks gestation.
February 1 – I found out about Gruff’s affair.
February 3 – Smooch’s first birthday.
April 6 – our offer was accepted on our first house.
June 15 – I moved into the new house.
8. What was your biggest achievement of the year? Salvaging my marriage.
9. What was your biggest failure? Our finances – I just feel overwhelmed by the entire concept sometimes.
11. What was the best thing you bought? My comfortable little 3-bedroom, 2-bath bilevel.
12. Whose behavior merited celebration? My friend’s sister K. Bear with me, here. Long story. I have a friend who lives in New England – we’d known each other online for years, had seen each other through pregnancies and babies and losses, but had never met. She’d had a really difficult year, and mine was just beginning to go bad, when her sister emailed me about setting up a surprise for my friend’s birthday. K made all the arrangments and paid for Smooch and I to fly up to New England. As it turned out, the timing couldn’t have been better. Though it was planned for four or five months, the trip took place about a month after I hit bottom. We spent a week at my friend’s house, and it was absolutely just what I needed. Even though it was a birthday gift to my friend, it was also a priceless gift for me. I’ll probably never be able to thank K for what she did for me this year.
13. Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed? My mother’s.
14. Where did most of your money go? Into the house, of course!
15. What did you get really, really, really excited about? Painting (walls, not portraits). Writing. The new words & signs that Smooch has learned.
16. What song will always remind you of 2007? “Together, in the backyard again (in the place where we belong, where we’ll probably sing a song and we’ll maybe dance along)! We’ve got the whole wide world in our yard to explore, that’s why everyday we’re back for more!”
17. Compared to this time last year, are you: a) happier or sadder? b) thinner or fatter? c) richer or poorer?
A)I’m probably sadder than I was at this time last year – back then, I was pregnant and in ignorant bliss about what my husband had done. I felt like the world was my oyster. I don’t say that because I’m generally sad these days – I’m actually at a pretty good place. But at the same time, I’m a little more cynical and jaded than I used to be.
B) I think I’m probably at the same weight! And when you consider that last year I was eight weeks pregnant, that means that I need to lose a few pounds.
C) Poorer, if you measure by how much spending money is lying around after each paycheck these days – but richer since we’re finally building up equity in our house after years of renting.
18. What do you wish you’d done more of? Visiting my grandparents, since it seems like every time I speak with members of the extended family I’m hearing of more health problems for them. I fear that time is slipping away from us.
19. What do you wish you’d done less of? Talking to my parents, especially during those dark first months of the year. I’m afraid that they may never be able to forgive Gruff for the pain they saw me in, even if they don’t know specific details. In the last few weeks, I’ve also found out that my mom has been talking to other family members about me, and I’m hurt and bewildered that she’s using my words against me. All this time I thought I was going to her for support – I was really giving her ammo.
20. How did you spend Christmas? We got up in the morning and had a quiet breakfast upstairs, then took Smooch down to the playroom for his gifts from us. (All the presents from family and friends had already been opened.) We gave him a beautiful wooden play kitchen and quite a few accessories – play food and pans and apron. The morning was really pleasant and idyllic, but then reality set in. I had diapers to wash, laundry to fold, meals to cook. The mommy-work just never takes a holiday.
21. Did you fall in love in 2007? I suppose I did – with my husband, as things started to come back together for us.
22. What was your favorite TV program? Brothers & Sisters – I love the writing, the pace, and the acting. (Don’t love the infidelity subplot, but it looks like they’ve just about wrapped that bit up.)
23. Do you hate anyone now that you didn’t hate this time last year? No. (I know what you’re thinking. Not even her.)
25. What was your greatest musical discovery? Pathetically, the light-rock radio station which plays Christmas music 24/7 starting the week before Thanksgiving.
26. What did you want and get? A house. My happiness back.
27. What did you want and not get? My baby in my arms.
28. What was your favorite film this year? Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix.
29. What did you do on your birthday and how old were you? I wrote a really long post. Went out to dinner, cleaned up Smooch when he dumped my entire glass of ice water in his lap, and had a really amazing chocolate mousse brownie when I got home. I turned 27.
30. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying? The power to stop my uterus from malfunctioning, again.
31. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2007? First six months – Depression Chic. Second six months – Mom On The Go.
32. What kept you sane? My friends, many of whom I only know online. Writing. Coffee.
33. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most? I really can’t think of anyone this time around.
34. What political issue stirred you the most? I’ve been so out of the loop, I really didn’t pay any attention to politics. I need to start, though. I promise I won’t vote uniformed in November.
35. Who did you miss? My friend B from Nashville. I’ve got plans to go back for a visit after the new year, though.
36. Who was the best new person you met? C, a mom who helps run the attachment-parenting playgroup we joined. She and her daughter are a great match for Smooch and I. I think she’s funny and smart, and she inspires me to try new things (composting! EC!). Just today, I called her at 9:30 and invited her over for an impromptu playdate. There were dishes piled sky-high in my sink and laundry needing folding all over my bed, but it didn’t matter. It’s always good to have a wonderful friend like that.
37. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2007. I cannot control what the people around me choose to do. I can control the way I behave, though, and I need to honor my own needs. If that means that I speak up about something that’s a sensitive subject, or that I say no to something I’m being asked to do, or that I march to a different beat, then that’s fine. People who really love me will learn to accept that.
38. Quote a song lyric that sums up your year.
“I’ll start this broken heart
I’ll fix it up so it will work again
Better than before”
Yeah. These questions were more fun last year. If you’ve been with me for long (or browsed my archives even a little bit), you know that 2007 wasn’t a kind, gentle, nurturing year for me. It was more of a bad-ass, kick-you-when-you’re-down, bi-polar with major episodes year. Hopefully 2008 is a year that has taken its meds and practices yoga, or something – I don’t expect miraculous heights every day, I’d just like to catch a break and find the center position, you know?
If you’re hitting the end-of-the-year wall or need your mojo pinched, consider yourself tagged. And let me know, I’d love to hear about your YiR. Especially if your year was better than mine – and odds are, it was.